The mirror did something… maybe???

University Bridge, Seattle, Washington (view f...

University Bridge, Seattle, Washington (view from the west) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Just a quick — if puzzling — update on the neighbor saga about which I posted last week.  Then I posted about putting a mirror in the window, facing their house, to deflect their energy back to them.  I’ve felt better ever since.  Often those mirrors lead to some resolution, so hoped for that as well…

On Sunday he worked in their yard.  As he finished I looked out and realized he must have dumped or blown a bunch of leaves from their yard onto our side yard as they’re twice as deep over there now as in the rest of the yard.

I’m not sure what reaction he expected but I thought it was kind of funny.

  1. He knows we have a yard service so what’s it to us?
  2. This year we’re having them mow the leaves into the grass to mulch since the soil needs it.  So YEAH! more mulch!

So the mirror may have done something.  Something unexpected…  Hmmm…

In the meantime, I realized that the incident last week triggered my fear response.  When he used to jump into the garage or driveway or at our car to yell, I felt afraid every time I stepped out of the house.  And now it’s back.

I’ve always had a tendency to freeze like a deer in the headlights when someone starts yelling, so he pretty much got away with all the previous attacks.  So I’ve decided to invoke my “you can’t do that again” power.

You see I also have a history of occasionally drawing a proverbial line in the sand… mentally… strongly… and then … it never happens again.

My favorite story is from years back, before I knew anything about metaphysics, energy, etc.  In my second year of law school I lived across Seattle’s University Bridge from the law school.  The walkways on the bridge were also where bicyclists rode.

They rode fast, didn’t care about pedestrians and would ride up from behind without giving a warning and knock you to the side — into the bridge rails — as they flew on past.  With a 30 pound backpack full of law books that shifted to the side with the impact, I hit hard and so often that I had permanent bruises on my right side.

Finally one day as I smacked into the rail I stopped, looked at the sky with my mean face on and mentally announced to the heavens, “The next biker who knocks me into the rail IS GOING OVER THE SIDE!”  And no one ever knocked me into the rail again…

Every now and then since I’ve come to a place where I mentally resolved I would not take it any more or let something happen again …  and it never did.  Something about reaching a place of strength internally and mentally drawing the line seems to change what I magnetize.

I’m not trying to borrow trouble, I just feel I need to mentally make a stand and quit walking out peering fearfully around to see if I’m going to be attacked in my own yard.

Running up to people yelling in a menacing way is technically assault (see that law degree was good for something!).  If my neighbor ever runs at me yelling again, he will hear that he may not do that ever again and if he does I’ll be filing a complaint with the police.

I know I also have some more healing to do about what led me to draw someone with a scary temper (first guess would have something to do with some fiery-tempered family members…) as a neighbor (like the list I already made wasn’t long enough 🙂 ).

But I also draw the line here.  It’s not okay to jump into my face yelling and I WON’T TAKE IT ANY MORE!

13 thoughts on “The mirror did something… maybe???

  1. Oh Leigh! You have no idea how much I needed to read what you wrote tonight! I have a situation at work that mirrors your bike in that I have allowed myself to feel like a victim of someone else’s behaviour – NO MORE!

    thank you my friend! I so appreciate your words, your wisdom and you.

    • Oh I love to hear that!
      It’s something how the timing worked out: I already had a post scheduled to go up tonight on my other blog, so I wrote this one planning to schedule it for tomorrow. But I started having a funny feeling as I got ready to schedule, so I went inward and asked if it should wait till tomorrow and heard a resounding, “NO, post it NOW”. Then you made this comment just a few minutes later!

  2. Wow. Powerful, Leigh. What strength and power you have in your energy. And it is contagious. Just reading your words has empowered me in some way. When I think of Lina’s eating disorder, it’s like I am filled with this power to say, “NO MORE! YOU ARE NOT WELCOME IN OUR LIVES!. Thank you! Thank you! What a gift you are!

  3. Oh good for you. I’ve done the same thing from time to time – where I’ve just reached my limit and let the universe know about it. Enough! I remember walking on a busy narrow path with many people coming towards me. I’d shrink with everyone to give them space. Suddenly I had the thought – I’m allowed to take up space in the world! I stopped shrinking. I don’t know how people got by me but I took all the space I wanted. I also claim my share of the arm rest on airplanes these days. It’s great isn’t it when we get so clear, and so adamant that things change?!

    • Oh, I like that idea of feeling right to take up space. I think that one kind of slid away for me without having to have the line in the sand moment, but boy do I remember feeling that way.
      It really underscores how we work with energy and magnetize that we can make these decisions and everything changes without having actually yelled or said “NO!” Love it.

  4. Have a victim inclined friend. Trying to teach her to get angry. Terribly hard for some people. I spent most of my life being afraid pretty much of everything and everyone; unless I got furiously angry, then I felt invincible. Enough is enough. You are so right.
    I think I’ve finally found some solid rock inside, so don’t have to get angry or feel invincible.

    • Sometimes it just takes getting to the right place to flip the switch. Hard to teach it if she hasn’t hit that place of either feeling self worth or at least feeling, this is the line no one can cross. Isn’t it nice to get that to that solid rock?

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