Around the same time in the early 90’s I worked with a lot of inner child stuff during the Fischer Hoffman work and with the level of “ku” in Hawaiian Huna*. As the concepts within each of those frameworks were explained, I found them to share most of the same components:
- rule the body
- similar to ego
- develop constructs based on interpretations of early childhood experiences
- source of many or all hidden/unconscious beliefs (based on #3)
- often running the show instead of conscious mind (lono)
In the Fischer-Hoffman work we did exercises involving conversations with inner child and intellect. In the Huna work we did exercises involving lono and ku.
Perhaps the most surprising revelation for me arose from connecting with my inner child deeply enough to “get” the world from her point of view. To realize that for a tiny child, adults are huge and appear to hold the power of life and death over a child who depends upon them for everything.
Anger, rage, sarcasm, criticism, etc. can all be magnified through a child’s eyes in part because of the size differential; to be a child surrounded by adults is like a Lilliputian landing on an island of giants. I began to understand why I unconsciously held so firmly to old, unneeded beliefs. Because the consequences of all the anger raining down on me and around me seemed dire and life-threatening.
My inner child learned to hide and make herself small, trying to avoid setting off a temper tantrum. Hoping not to be noticed so no one would realize I was there, apparently deserving of constant criticism, correction and angry outbursts. Everything was dramatic to her. During the pounding and yelling phase of Fischer-Hoffman I felt that that level of drama coming from me helped her to see I could hold my own. That making it big helped to drive the huge impact of the past away.
It’s taken years of exploring to unravel her paranoid belief system, stopping often to remind her that though the threat was big then, I’m big and strong now and able to take care of her/us. I think I could do half a dozen posts on the various practices and techniques I wound up using over the years to heal those wounds. A partial list: As well as Fischer Hoffman process, certain forms of body work, meditation, ceremony, ancestral and past life exploration, hands on healing, affirmations and a fun technique I learned from Serge King using “ku stones” to change ku’s beliefs.
I don’t know that I’d say it’s finished, but generally when I check in with my inner child now she’s calm. Most of the time, in fact, I feel one with her and as if it doesn’t require a separate consultation to know how she feels.
I’d make a guess that at least 90% of the U.S. population carries some amount of childhood wounds and operates out of the world view developed in infancy or as toddlers. Some form of healing for the inner child, usually including exploring unconscious beliefs and releasing them, is the only way I know to step into life as an adult being ruled by the conscious mind. A whole lot of folks live in adult bodies and operate as five-year-olds….
* My initial Huna teacher was Serge King who uses his own words for the three levels of being. The usual kahuna word for ku is unihipili.