The above picture is presented with gratitude for Laurie’s permission to use her art. Please go check it out on her site.
The last four or five days have been interesting and trying. A bad cold over the weekend had me down for the count. One night while miserably not sleeping from its effects the muscles in my jaw opened enough for the formerly numb nerve endings to come to life and shout “Ow!” I didn’t know my jaw could hurt that much without a dentist in the story. Then that gave me a headache.
When I finally gave up on sleep and got up to make a nest by the T.V. and hang out I was thinking, “This is too much! Really, on top of the cold you now have to saddle me with this?” But later, after the Ibuprofen kicked in, I realized that for the first time in living memory my jaw didn’t feel clenched. There are still some strands of muscles that haven’t finished the unwinding process but the deep, deep stuff wound into my jaw — especially at the hinges — has finally let go enough for me to feel like my jaw is relatively restored to health.
Suddenly I felt thankful that the Universe let me have all that misery at once instead of in consecutive rounds over the course of days or weeks. And so grateful to feel the flow of blood and energy in my poor, formerly-numb-with-tightness jaw.
The post on Brenda’s Blog last week talked about a spell of transition arriving during the week and although her piece talked about big emotional responses, I felt like my cold and the muscle shifts were my responses. If I released a bunch of associated emotions I never noted it. But something changed.
I’ve said for a while that I felt like the muscles holding on in my face and head were creating emotional feeling tones of their own even though I released most of the emotional stuff that created them. And along the way I figured out that ancestral patterns created a lot of the muscle patterns in that area. I’m noticing so far that this shift leaves me feeling free of that sense of “jaw-clenching” anger or tense anxiety that most of the time were at odds with what I really felt at any given time.
This long journey hasn’t finished. I keep giving you lots of detail because I so believe that your muscles have such an impact on your spiritual journey and your emotional journey. Whatever you have yet to address in your muscle system may be just the healing you need.